Hating On My Dad

Dad and Mom

I wrote a book. Most of the book centered around myself from the age of four and how my dad mistreated me. It contains some great stories, some funny, some harsh, but I’ll never attempt to publish it. As I read it now I can see the hate that was inside me hidden in the words, even though I tried to cover it with the humor.

After becoming a Christian, hate left me. I didn’t realize it at first, never really thought about it. I found out sin does not leave when you become saved, but some things just up and leave.

I get corrected sometimes when I write about my Christian journey because I’ve not been to theology school nor do I have any degrees. I am just relaying what’s happening to me. Maybe my journey is not the textbook roadmap that I should be following, but it’s my journey. I don’t mind being corrected. I usually gain valuable new knowledge, however I get my main guidance from the Bible and the Holy Spirit.

My parents married young and seemed so happy in the photos. Many things happened later that I will not go into here. (This would be a great place to say: you gotta buy the book to see what happens.)LOL. Anyway, there was much fighting and anger and I was just thinking, I don’t remember my dad ever telling me that he loved me, but more than that, I am positive that I never told him that I loved him. I know this because I didn’t love him. I was scared to death of him until I was grown, then the fear became hate.

I carried this hatred fifty years. There is no telling how it affected my life, my family, even my ability to love.

If accepting Jesus as my savior only took away hate. If there were no offer of eternal life, with no more pain or suffering, no reuniting with lost loved ones. If there was nothing else, no other promise but eliminating hate, wouldn’t that be worth it? It would be for me. I don’t know about others, but after hate left me, I felt like a new person.

I can only imagine what the world would be like if hate no longer existed…..A little bit of Heaven?

Thanks, Dennis ….Jesus Is Lord!

6 Comments on “Hating On My Dad

  1. Dennis… thank you for this post. It really touched my heart. Sometimes it’s hard to be brutally honest with yourself, but it is very freeing. I related to the post because I had the same experience, only it was with my mother. I still have the memories, but by the grace of God, they are no longer painful and I have forgiven her.
    Psalms 147:3 – He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.

  2. Psalms 147:3 – He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds. Thanks and I didn’t put it in there, but I also wondered what would have happened if I had told him that I loved him.

  3. Yes, I wonder too. Back then, it wasn’t common to express feelings of love. It was almost unmanly for men and maybe they just assumed we knew because they provided for their children. I think the most important thing now is that we make sure our children know we love them and not repeat the negative actions of our parents. We say “I love you” often.

  4. Hello Stanley,

    good morning its 4:40 am

    I am reading your blog. Thank you for telling us about your book. I want to read the book written by you. tell me the name of the book you wrote. I feel sorry about hearing your dad mistreated you in the age of four. I also get guidance for Bible.

    • Thank you Robert. I don’t have plans to publish the book as it is because I held hate for my dad and I see it in the stories. I may re-write it

  5. Pingback: My Daddy The Victor - The Daily Sinner

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