Being A Pessimist Is Hard Work

I always tended to be a pessimist. Lord, I can’t understand what Liz ever saw in me, or how she could have put up with me for so long. Even when something good happened in our lives, I couldn’t enjoy it, because I knew bad was soon coming. I really believed that if a good thing happened, bad things would shortly follow. Once that good thing happened, as a dedicated pessimist, my work began. I needed to monitor every life event until bad things were noted because I was just not happy until the bad came. I could not appreciate the good that had previously happened until the bad showed up! Only then could I move ahead. So, you can see why I think being a pessimist is hard work.

Pessimist, The Word

The word pessimist is not used in the Bible. It didn’t become a word until about 1785. But the King James Bible uses despair and sadness frequently, and those two words are synonyms of pessimism. The word hope is also used extensively in the Bible, which would be the opposite of hopelessness, another major synonym of pessimism.

David speaks to his own soul about his sadness and despair in Psalms 43: 5 when he says, “Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why are you disturbed within me?” But he knows the remedy as he says, “Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.“

Whatever word we use: pessimism, despair, sadness, or hopelessness, they all result in much anxiety. I can vouch for that.

1 Peter 5:7 says: “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

Being a fisherman, I think Peter used the word “cast,” because he knew once he cast his fishing net, the heavy weight of the net would be lifted off him. He no longer had control of the net, but he had HOPE of a good outcome. In the same way, when I believed and found hope in Jesus, I was able to cast my pessimism and anxiety on to Him.

Enough Is Enough

There are literally 1000 examples of my pessimism, but here’s just one. I picked this one, because even though it’s an extreme example, it’s the one that began my pessimistic recovery.

Way back in 1980, at age 28, I was promoted to manager at a large car dealership in Memphis. Along with more money came two brand new cars, one for me and one for Liz as well. She was ecstatic and couldn’t understand why I was not. Oh, I relished the thought of two new cars and my perceived prestige the fancy new title would bring. However, inside I was absolutely miserable and terrified of the bad things that I felt would now follow.

I’m sure she already suspected, but when I told Liz how I felt, she was furious. She was sick of my pessimistic attitude. Now, over the years, I had done many…..oh sooo many things to make her mad. But this time I do believe she would have actually strangled me and hidden my body where no one could ever find it given the opportunity. This had to rate at the very top of her madness scale. I’m telling you, even her bright blonde hair turned blood red. But to me, I just saw her anger as proof that bad things would now begin to happen – her anger at me being the first.

Scared Straight

There were no cell phones in 1980, only beepers. Remember beepers? I asked the younger guys at work, and they didn’t know what they were. Anyway, they gave me one of those things with my new job. At that time, you were really somebody if you had a beeper. (Or that’s what I thought). So a couple of days later when my beeper went off at work and the screen read: WIFE IN ACCIDENT COVINGTON PIKE AND JAMES RD, my first thoughts were of course fear and panic. But, admittedly, “I knew something bad would happen” came right out of my mouth while getting in the car.

I recognized the location because it was the site of many serious accidents, and I raced to the very busy and noisy scene. When I arrived, the wrecker was loading what was left of her car. There were police, fire, ambulance, and people everywhere. At the site of her car and the ambulance, my heart sank and then…. all the sounds went silent. (Has this happened to you before)? Like you’re outside your body looking on. I remember a policeman talking to me, but I heard nothing until he said, “Your wife is ok. She is in the back seat of my car.” The noise immediately returned, but through it all, I heard her calling my name. It is at a time like this, you want to hold her. Just hearing her voice call out your name gives you overwhelming joy. It is a time like this when you understand just how much you love and need someone. It is also a time like this that you thank God.

Liz had been T-boned, but luckily hit on the passenger side. Had she been hit on the driver’s side, she would have been gravely injured, or worse. Airbags were not around yet, and seeing how badly her car was damaged, I don’t think they would have made much difference. To be honest, I don’t know about the other driver, but I have to assume that’s who the ambulance was for.

So why does it sometimes take an event like this to change us? Why did it take an event like this for me to thank God? The pessimist in me had been vilified. Receiving the promotion and new cars had resulted in the destruction of a new car and near destruction of my beloved Liz. A true pessimist could now be happy, but I believe God got my attention. I was happy now not because the bad had shown up, but because God had spared someone I loved.

Although it improved, I still struggled with pessimism for years until I accepted Jesus as my Lord and savior. I cast out the old pessimistic man and Jesus brought in the new man. After that, I knew where I was going, and that God was in charge. What have I to be pessimistic about? Psalm 118:6 says: “The LORD is on my side; I will not fear; what can man do unto me”.

The New Man

Recently I began to replace my kitchen counters. Being a woodworker, I have always wanted the beauty of real walnut counters. However, my 35-year-old wood planer did not like the walnut. It began vibrating badly and making a loud screeching noise. . So I naturally tore it apart, then tore it more apart until I reached the point of no return. I looked at the pile of gears, bearings, screws, nuts, bolts, rollers, electrical wires, and miscellaneous parts that had fallen on the garage floor and said to myself, “Well, that’s not ever going back together.” So, I decided to put the rusty old boy to rest, loaded up the walnut, and went to use the planer at the hospital construction shop where I work. Well, nobody told me, but it was also broken. So, my kitchen counters are torn off, I have no planer, and the closest acceptable one I can afford is in Santa Something, California.

Now, this chain of events is a pessimist’s dream come true, but he (the pessimist) is not here anymore. I figured it was time for a new planer anyway, because I will soon retire, and that will include plenty of woodworking. I ordered the new one on Saturday. Apparently, it’s coming snail mail, because after 6 days, it’s only made it to Arizona, which borders California. No worries, I’ll live just fine without kitchen counters and the fish are beginning to bite anyway. This is a totally new outlook for a now fully recovered pessimist! I think God is pleased with his handiwork.